Ma Big Fat Memoir - Laughter

It was all around me. I felt it like I was laughing. I was in a play field today. Boys were trying to roll the roller. I didn’t know what you call it. It was used for leveling the cricket pitch. They were playing cricket n football and football n cricket. Some of them winded up because it was getting dark. It was really nostalgic to be in a field even if I was not playing. This gave me a pleasure that I forgot for a long time.

Now I started walking past the play field. I could hear the crickets, the sound of coming night. I was living in this world where everybody like me belonged. What I saw was the sky above and greenery around me. The lights were showing up in the street. Dogs were wandering here n there and countless bats were flying to the west. Yes it was a fearless night for them.

I didn’t know when I started walking fast. The crowd irritated me especially when I was not with the crowd sometimes when I was in the crowd. In both cases I would be my own preference if I was not with friends.

But there are times you want to prefer yourself so you leave friends behind literarily. And there are times you will be damned without them. A playfield is where you need to be with them.

My mind was going somewhere else. Where I thought it was taking me? There were so many faces, scenes and moments. At last those red eyes that bear so much of pain. I could see the humanity, kindness and the pain he carried in his eyes. That was enough for me to forget the laughter. By looking at his eyes I wanted to take some pain from him to show him how beautiful this world was for us. But I knew I couldn’t take every grief from everyone with me. So I dropped off that thought.

I heard some monks could travel everywhere through meditation, but I travel everywhere when I walk alone. I walk into each nook and corner of this world, into every mind which laugh or cry. I find a way to be part of them as I want them not to be alone in the crowd and to pour out the laughter I carry, on the way….